Ive been doing good

ive been doing good. stop missing you and stoped thinking about you and to top it off i have someone in my life helpping me throught whatever and sticking by my side and helping me open my heart up again... life is getting better each day (:

your still in my heart...

RJ MAGSOMBOL! you mean a lot to me... were not talking. i stoped calling you billions of times and stoped busting up your phone when i really wanna talk to you and tell you whats sup and whats happening. its like lost the most important person of my life. my friend asked me do you wanna hurt and feel this pain once or keeping holding on and hurt every single day of your life and i answer if its for RJ, i'll hurt and feel this pain everyday cos i love him and only him no one else but i thought about it and i deserve my happiness too! so im tryna, but its not working, but it kinda is. letting go is hard cos the truth is i really dont. if we're meant to be we'll find our way; your my first love and your first love never dies. i dont think i can ever offially get over you but i can try, i really dont want too, i really just want you in my life again. but i need to respect your wishes and give you your timee. i know i'll see and talk to you again- hopefully soon. i love you and no matter what always will.

him

rj magsombol ): you will always be my first love, no matter what i love you too death and i dont think that'll change. even if you crushed my heart a billion of times, look im still here =/ you need you time and im trying to respect that but its soooo hard cos now that im ready to love you again you need your time to get your shit together and you i just dont know what to do and where to go from here... my heart hurts! i still want to be with you and i still love you... =/ this shit killing me. your going to be the death of me. im slowly dieing and hurting from this stupid pain only you can take away.

RJ MAGSOMBOL
We past 9 months, me made it to 2yrs & 2wks.

What happenes from here? Where do we go from here? Iduno. Time to move on? Maybe so. We try and we try to fix things between us but it seems like we can't. You dont call me, its been 4 days since i last heard your voice. Your birthday on friday October 16 and if I dont get to talk to you before that, we have nothing more and nothing left. But I will always love you, no doubt about that.

RJ Magsombol

If I hadn't met you, I wouldn't like you. If I hadn't liked you, I wouldn't love you. If I wouldn't love you, I wouldn't miss you. But I did, I do and I will. I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care, I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are or what you're doing, but I can't help it, cause I'm in love with you. It's not fair how your gone, and how you're moving on so fast, while I am still living in the past. I miss you a little, I guess you could say, a little too much, a little too often, and a little more each day.


But I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me - I’m going to smile.

hella busy

i swear i get homework every fucking day. for some reason i have a bad feeling about this school year and it hasnt even been a week! I HATE MY MATH TEACHER SO MUCH, i hope he droips died so i can stand up point and laugh at him. and like i dont hate peopel since hate is like a strong word but i hate him! damn, i have blog in hella long. school keeping me busy and like i barely even kick it and see people now. but lately i havent been caring about hella things and i need to start. im tryna stay away from my cell phone but during class i text like through out the whole day and i need to stop. woodshop makes my head and hand hurt soooo badd =/ blahh... erghh... things been crazy, school is stressful. i hope i do good!

Pinasss (:

im so happy im with my family, i havent done a blog in a hot min. KUYA KARIM IS HELLAAAA FUNNNYYY! and i got to see some old friends but its not the same anymoree. no one hangs out with the same people but hey thats lifee! well its kewll. i like it here but i just now wanna go homeee.

true friends

im not going to lie KRB and RGAY are the ONLY people i can count on for sureee! they've been there since day one! we had tons or bumpy roads but were still hella close ♥ only bitches i trust and rely on. ive learned this summer that i my past so called "true friends" arent reallyy and im not gon waste my time tryna save our friendship cos ive been tryna and now im quiting and dont with it they can come to mee. KRB and RGAY no what to say and no what to do when something wrong with me! I LOVE KATIE AND BRITTANY AND ROMMEL too death! and no matter what happend, i got your backs! My ride or dies for lifee!

its getting crazier.

im leaving in least than 2wks, ehhh! blehhh.
ima miss youu...

past...

you were such a good friend. i cant beleive that i losted you... OMFG im sorry for evrything that has happened. i honestly didnt want our friendship too end like that... but it did and i cant do shit to change that... you got a girl and i told her i'll stay away and its hard too cos even if we were friends for just a short period of time and all that shit that happened between us i went to you when i needed help; you were one phone call away and you were just there for me and you promised me no matter what happens we'll still be friends... you broke ALL the promises you made me, whateverrr. the only one that actually hurts the most if the promise you made me saying you'll always be there which was all bullshit. i respect your girl wishes and i'll stay away. its been a month noww. whatever happened between us is clear like glass and im so over it, i just want my friend back. thats all reallyy.

SUMMER

NO MORE FAWKING SCHOOOL, NO MORE WAKING UP EARLY AND NO MORE HAVING TO CARE ABOUT WHAT CLOTHS TO WEAR. OH YESSS, SUMMER 2009 BABYYY!

yupees.

so there a few people in my life that i'll never forget, ever! no matter how bad they hurt me and i hurt them, get annoyed of them, and never see them... i got mad lovee for themm.

Katie Dun- my other half, the person i love so much. the only person i trustfully and i can tell everything too knowing you wont say shit or tell everyone. We share secrets with no judgement. Omfg we eat like a pigg (: haha. sushiland was the shit back then. ahaha, we always use to be at the mall kicking itt, MALL RATS. dang, we laugh till we fawking cry and people be staring at us like were fawking crazy. i miss you hella, i promise when we do get too kick it nothing will change about uss. I FAWKING LOVE YOU MOREE THAN YOU KNOW, your not only my bestfran, your more like a sisterr. things been a bit crazy for you and i totally understand that. no matter what i love you and i dont careee if we dont talkk. oh weee. our sleep overs were the fawking best, swearr. with brittany me and you tryna fit in my small ass room. haha. we would just tear our hearts open to each other, and never hide anythingg from each otherr. us staying out HELLAAA latee. On BSM was the shitt. i think its the last pictues all three of us took together ):britt went bye byee from uss. but you and i stayed closee and never left each other sidee. i love you for everything and i lovvee everything about youu. diyamm i miss youu<3>

Nicole FAWKING Moro- so dang, we've been through everything, and thats a fawking fact! haters, fran, bestfrans, wifeyy. Even if were hella distant know, you know why i am so you cant say shit about us not kicking it. lmao. but promise druing the summer we will. but your a whore and i love you bitch so dont second think that i dont. even if you annoy the fawk outta me i love your ass. haha. but you are fawking annoying tho. you complain about everythingg. diyam its like STFU already. its cos your an only child, spolied bitch (: but i love youu hella. diyam, we've through hella. like its crazy how were still friends but wanna know whats funny? were number one on each others top and we dont even talk anymore. we go to the same school and i never fawking see you, the fawk is up with that, we talk every blue one. but you know what they say about real friends: the can grow apart without really growing apart, ya get it? iduno if you will cos your stupidd. haha. diyam indian, jayy kayy.

Brittany Yocum- my ex-wifey... we always use to kick it, ALWAYS. katie, rj and i. always. us everyday. we spent so much time together and shared so much fawking secrets. i know i can trust you and no matter what i will... we dont talk as much anymore... once in awhile cos of fawking school! but when summer hits, were kicking it (: i cant wait. i cant wait for us staying up all night and just chatting it up. i miss that. i miss you hella. but heyy, we had our differences at times. i remember this one time we didnt talk for months but we patch things up. were not so close like we use too but your still very close to my heart. i have that tape you wrote on still. never three that away. 082607 is our day. diyamm, almost 2 years nowww. i loveee youuu. my very first thai fran. your such a good person. and always on track with her school. i fawking love your ass hoee (:

RJ Magsombol- your my ex-boyfran and no matter what happened betweens us we mange to work things out and stay frans. we had a bumpy ass road. diyam, we've throught pretty much everything. i hope you know i still got mad love for you, even if were not going out your my bestfran and you've proved to me you'll ALWAYS BE THERE for me when the going get rough. you call me late at night and it gets me soo mad cos most of the time im fawking sleeping or about too. geezzz, call earlier. haha. but we have so much memos together. all the fights and the sleepless nights and all the tears i cried the good times we shared overweighs it all. your an amazing person and one of the bestestfrans i have everr had. you always know how to make me smile and know what to do too piss me off which is pretty much everything cos i get pissed off and annoyed HELLA fast. sorry for everything i've done to hurt you, i dont mean too... it just happens. i love you fawkkerr. NO MATTER WHAT! we'll always be bestfrans. XD

BUT MOST OF ALL MY FAMILY. WHOS BEEN THERE FROM DAY UNO. I LOVE THEM FOR EVERYTHING... EVEN WHEN WE GET TO THOSE TIMES WHEN WE JUST WANNA RUN TO AFRICA OR JUST KILL EACH OTHER. THEY KNOW ME AND MOST OF ALL THE FOOD I HATEEE AND LOVEEE. THEY KNOW WHEN IM ANNOYED AND WHO I HATE. THEY KEEP IT REAL WITH ME. I LOVE THEM HELLA. NO ONE WILL LOVE THEM AS MUCH AS I DO. I KNOW I DONT TELL THEM THAT I DO AND I BITCH AT THEM LIKE CRAZY, I LOVE THEM.

AND MY BROTHER FROM A DIFFERENT MOTHER. I KNOWN HIM MY WHOLE LIFE WELL EVER SINCE I SHOULD UNDERSTAND THINGS BUT IVE NEVER MEET HIM YET; I GOT MAD LOVE FOR HIM NO MATTER WHATT! I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR HIM. JOSHUA MARQUEZ, I FAWKING LOVE YOU.

pisses me off

when people push away the person they likee or lovee. its like there right there in front of you why wont you open your eyes and go get it. it feels like im wasting my time sometimes with you! i swear, im right here! i do HELLA things for you and why dont you see... im right here! urghh. its getss me so fawking annoyed and pisses me the fawk off. why you gon push me away... the more you push me away the more your tearing a piece of my heart. YOUR KILLING ME.

shes a bitch.

OMFG!

if you wanted know drama then you should of told me.

if you didnt want me to bitch at you then you should just stop tryna talk to me.

LEAVE ME THE FAWK ALONE.

cos honestly your UGLY ASS FAWK, noo your more like HAMMERED.

you need to learn how to dress.

come on noww.

your starting middle school drama. the fawk!?

i out grew that stange hun.

but keep talking your shit.

watch and see whats gon happen.

yeah, i'll still bitch at you and yell at you.

but push me too far...

you'll see what happens.

YOU FAWKING HAMMERED ASS BITCH.

NO ONE FAWKING LIKES YOU!

AND YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO STFU.

YOU TALKING IS JUST ANNOYING.

yeah i talk a lot but i know when to fawking stop,

not like your bitch ass just keeps talking.

the fawk, thats why you cant say shit when im talking to you.

FAWKING PUSSY!

talk shit to my face and not to others.

fawking retarded ass bitch.

whyy.

why do you always try to push me away when i'll im trying to do is get closer to you. i wanna know i i honestly feel for you but everytime i try its like you dont care. you push me away always. all i wanna know WHY! why are you doing this too me when i always was so sweet and nice too you. why do you wanna hurt me this way or can you even tell you are? why dont you show me you care? erghh, i kind feel like a dumb bitch and im sick of feeling like this but what can i do. just sit around and live life while i just wait on you...

bye bye

school is coming to an end, ima miss everyone! every the haters XD. lmao. and some teachers are leaving, ehhh! whyyyy!? oh yeee school is running low on $$$$, me gon miss everyonee. i like sealth even if its not to good of a school. i remember going to the baseball game and cheering on BBHS cos i lovee that school. the people from the baseball time were pissed but i didnt caree. BBHS is kewlerr. haha. (: dang courtny loud ass, im actually gon miss her. shes hella funnyy. alex is moving oh well shit, he belongs in renton. + he was barely at school to begin with. brad is a retard and him singing in the class im actually gonna miss. andre is just plain annoying and i wont miss for shitt, jasminee honeyyy and her yummyyy foodd<3 me gon miss your cooking. but the person i will miss the most is somala<3 weve gotton hellaaa closee. no bitch can replace her, my fakegirlfrann foreverr hate on us if you please cos diyam we already gott hella haters we wont mind for a little moreee. lmao. shes so buntt, swearrr. she'll tell you wassup. ima miss her hella. kuyaaa freeee! yeee kuyaaa, me gon miss you! hes like my roll model, and im not kidding. hes been there for me since i met him... people saw im his fav, nawww me think diff. but dang next year gon suck, whos gon help me with my BS and those girlss? ehhh, he better come a visit meee! JACKIEEEE is like my funny bunnyyy! she thinks im super spoiled. im nottt. but we have this jame with each otherrr. its funn. lmao. and all the seniors that are leaving, good luck class of 2009. come and visit mee down at sealth, but heyy i already know youu will, well some of you folks that are staying in WA areee.


but heyy, summa gon be funn. kicking it with some old fellas i use too. and get too know some (: yeee. me loveee my frans. hopefully this summa goonnn be better than last! wait i know its going to be XD summa '09 babbyyy.

Kuya Josh

dear joshua marquez,
i knew about you ever i was little: my whole life actually. i always wonder who you were and when was i gonna meet you. i had this weird imagination that when im older i would hurry people to go look for you and we'll take DNA test to prove you were actually my brother from a different mother. i dreamed about growing up with you and what you would be like. wonder if we looked alike, who sides would you take when me and lydia would get in a fight. i have so much questions to ask you and its crazy. i wanna tell you everything you missed out on in my life, ive always wanted a older brother and i knew i had one somewhere out there. i remeember crying on night cos i wanted to meet you so bad and i would always wonder if you knew you had little sisters and when you do find out will you claim were yours sisters. so many thoughts i never thought it'll be answer. im not going to lie, it felt like hell knowing that there was something missing in your lifee. a whole other part of you that'll never be completed. then one day my uncle decided to look you up, and thank god he did cos i found you. i was happy, i wanted to ask you so much things, but i was scaredd, ehh. im not going to lie im still am. i have hella questions i wanna ask you but i dont want you to get annoyed from me noww. i dont wanna losee you ): i looked for you for so long and now that i found you i never want you to goo. i want you to be in my life till the day i die. maybe myspace will be the only way i'll talk to you and see you, maybe i'll never get the chance to see you and spend time with you and maybe i will. i just want one day with you, brother and sister bonding time. i want tl get to know you moree and see how were alike and and if we look alike. i wanna do so much... but iduno, this on the internet might just be it for us getting to know each other. i hope you know i love you and care so much for you regradless if i never meet you. your my brother and i will always love you no matte what happens between uss. your always be my big brother. and i love youu. always and forever, thats a promise.

p.s. i wish you get to come down to my debut. its going to be a very speacil day for me and i want you there, but thats 3 yrs from now, who knows what happens. but i really do hope you'll be there (:

idunooo

so all i been doing lately is thinking, tons of thinking and no lie im happy but i want more than what i have... i want to be truely happy and laughing. i wanna move schools but why cant i? well idunoo wassup anymore. i just wants certain people in my life but i know i cant have and others i cant have anymore... life is good, im not going to lie, but i just want those people to be in it and some completly out of it.

realist shit!

There's always a little truth behind every "just kidding",

a little curiousity behind every "just wondering",

a little knowledge behind every "i don't know",

and a little emotion behind every "i don't care".

this is super duper ober real and hellaaaa true.

blehhh....

ehhhh, so im all losted and confused and i dont know what to do. dang, i cant tell anyone wassup with me cos the only person i can only well you know how you'll always have this one person you know for a fact and you wont have second thoughts about telling them anything cos there like trustworthy and honest and always there since like foreverrr well the person i go talk to for everything is right now going throw some stuff and i have to contact what so everrr but myspace and i hate talking about things on myspace; KATIE DUNN I MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY! i wanna tell you everything and like i try to always keep you updated and i do my best but this time its really hard cos i dont want people reading my shit. rawr, how am i going to tell you? dang do i miss our sleep over, kicking days, sushiland and acem times, and most of all our bonding time when we would just tell each other everything. >.< it feels like hell without you boo ): i love you and you'll never be replaced. i cant wait till your 18 and outtuh that joint!

top 10 things that bug me.

so i don't know why but these things bug the crap out of me....!
1. people who are YOUNGER than me call me hun.
2. how i miss place EVERYTHING, ALWAYS!
3. the password thingy to unlock my blackberry!
4. people claiming other races, OMG!
5. people who speak languages i dont understand around me
6. so called friends who say they miss you and want to kick it with you when they dont
7. people who dont call back and say/promise they will; HATE WAITING AROUND!
8. hardly ever having ice cream at home
9. people who think people are spying on you when NO ONE CARES!
OHH AND MOST OF ALL
10. I MISS MY FAMILY IN THE PHILIPPINES! urghhh.

hmmm...

so yayyyy! im like doing all my work, i aint slacking anymore. finally! geezzz, but i never found out whats been bugging me but heyy, as long as im doing my work im good, dont need to worry about a diyam thing, but my boyfriend<3 yupeesss. life if good babyyyy. dude i miss my boyfriend! its been too long. diyammm, i been loaded with testes, classwork, and homework, finally i dont have much to do anymore, but its kewl yoos. me ishhhh very happy, like how happy when a fat grown up is on a diet and finally gets to eat a slice of cake, LMAO. idunoo. well thats all. yupeesss.

lately

so i been having bad ass mood swings and im wondering where the fukk its coming from. so i been bitching at everyone and its not that i mean too im just do for no reason. another thing is that i been slacking at everything too; hella lazy to do shit now these days. but oh well, hmmm. i need to get myself together and get my self back on track. yupeee, thats what i got to do.

i miss katie

katie, geez, i love you so much! we been through so much and i will never forget you. i remember rj, brittany you && i were always together, metroing everywhere together(: we had so much plans too do! geeezzzz, then brittany faded away from us and it was just us 3 kikkin' it. our sleepover were the best! ohhh && eating at sushiland like always was yummy. i hate your mother! so bad i just wanna asdfghjkl; her in her face and shove a dikk down her mouth and she can choke on it! thats mean. well oh well. i thought she was all nice && shit but no she proved me wrong, shes a pain in the ass bitch! we were inseparable or so we thought! your mama just had to get in your life && fukk everything up! i was pissed! i go to you for everything. you always had the right words too say && it feels so weird cos i cant really trust any other laydee. danggggg, i miss our cum puff, lmao. ohhh && our song; "i like ice cream && bananas there so yummy hmmm". && photo whores mommets. its been hard for me cos i got so use to going through everything with you! my problems with RJ you helped me with && always gave me hope. you thought me that you have to fall first before you get back up again, katie baby! you have changed and made me to a better person. it's killing me that i cant do anything and say anything to your mama! i wish she would just let me see you already! i havent seen you since the time at norstom rack && still your mam wouldnt really let you talk to me! its not fair that. dangggg, i miss you so much.... i cant wait till your 18 && outtuh your mama's house! ohhh && your mama's boyfran can go to hell! love you katie && no matter what i always will! i miss you more than you can imagine even more then your boofran can...